I'm the cat you keep hearing about.
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
For your information, this has nothing to do with jealousy.
It just so happens that Oliver’s bath basin is also a great place for a tabby to catch some Z’s.
Of course it’s the moment when I’m under attack by ruthless mini-people that I forget my safe-word.
Help… HELP!!!
Fight the good fight, kid. I don’t let them put clothes on me either.
Not sure how you guessed that the password was “Turkey Feast with Gravy,” but now I’m obligated to give you a tour of my Sutter Home.
I’m no Don Draper, but here’s the pitch I recently made to a connection at Apple:
“Every computer these days comes with a mouse. Now, go with me for a second, what if…”
Ask yourself if you really want to make the easy joke about a cat loving lasagna, or if you’re better than that.
Furio: Started up on a 6, when he pulled from the clouds, and then I moved in above him.
Charlie: Well, if you were directly above him, how could you see him?
Furio: Because I was inverted.
Iceman: [coughs whilst saying] Bullshit.
Goose: No, he was man. It was a really great move. He was inverted.
Charlie: You were in a 4g inverted dive with a MiG28?
Furio: Yes, ma’am.
Took one last shot with Lisa before she goes and creates a new roommate.
If I look a little freaked out, it’s because Alex just said, “You’re the man of the house while we’re gone.” Sobering.
Watching the new Mad Men. Where are all the cats? I wanted to see if they used to sniff nip during the workday!
I am not being dramatic. I actually can’t believe that you’re not more upset that Cougar Town got snubbed by the Emmy’s. I know it’s just a play on words… but still.
Had a perfectly enjoyable nap ruined by my roommates’ inexplicable need to stroke my head.
The funny thing is, I have reversed roles with them before, to see how they like it. I’ve hopped on their bed at 5AM when they’re especially adorable, and jostled their faces or exposed limbs. They don’t respond nearly as well as I did, I can tell you that.
Alex pulled me up on his phone via FaceTime during his bus ride home.
I don’t know what sort of scintillating discourse he was expecting, but I was in the middle of a bath. I need to do a better job “defining boundaries”, I guess.
Free idea for anyone looking to make millions: mail bins that come with built-in knock-out blinds. How’s a tabby supposed to sleep past 10AM in these things?
I may look calm, but if you bug me when in the wrong mood, I’ll throw your hand in a vicious figure four (see Wikipedia).